Practice Gratitude

Have you heard the term “rumination”? To ruminate is to obsessively think about the same problems over and over. If you are experiencing depression or anxiety, it is likely that you have invasive negative thoughts, and that you struggle to focus on other things. Maybe you have suffered a great loss, or experienced a life change that isn’t positive. It may be that these experiences feel all consuming.

Depression and anxiety lie to us, and tells us over and over that these challenges represent the end of wellness and meaning. We must debate our depression and anxiety, and one of the best ways to do that is to practice gratitude. It may be that your relationship has ended, but that your health is intact. It may be that you were laid off at work, but that you are very much needed and cherished at home. Though our life presents many difficult challenges, it also presents many gifts- we just need to practice gratitude mindfully in order to see those gifts clearly, in all their significance.

If you are struggling to find things to feel grateful for, try these exercises:

·      Write a letter to someone who helped you or showed you kindness. You may or may not be able to send the letter, but the simple act of writing out the letter will remind you of the good you have experienced in the world! You can write a short letter every day to different people who showed you kindness throughout various periods in your life.

·      Keep a “List of Three”. Each day, write down three things you are grateful for. These can be large or small. For example, you may write down that the weather was beautiful, that a song you like came on the radio, that a friend called to say hello, that your loyal canine companion greeted you with a sloppy kiss when you came home, or that you woke up in a home powered by electricity and running water. This practice challenges us to rise above the loud lies of depression and anxiety, and to see clearly the positive things that fill our days!

·      Create reasons to celebrate. These reasons can be serious or silly. For example, you could celebrate a professional accomplishment by planning a formal dinner with colleagues. Or you could celebrate a pet’s “birthday” complete with invitations to other pets and their owners! If you are struggling to identify a reason to celebrate, an easy celebration to identify can be centered around a popular tv show or cultural event- for example, you could have a season finale party, or an Oscars party, and invite people to bring food in a potluck. Remember, celebrations do not have to complex or expensive. By creating reasons to celebrate, we create positive memories by engaging with others, thus generating many sources of gratitude. Sometimes when we are depressed, we feel unable to cultivate fun, socialization, or silliness into our lives- but humor, community, and joy are protective barriers from depression! Again, challenge yourself to make a list of things you could celebrate, both serious and silly, and identify a corresponding action. Bring the celebration to life!

Share how you will enact these ideas in your life. What has worked for you in the past? What do you feel is important for others to know? Looking forward to your discussion!

Take Care of Your Temple- Your Body

Depression and anxiety throw us into a wrestling match with our own mind- an endless, exhausting fight with our inner self. Therefore, a very effective way to combat the lies depression/anxiety repeat in our minds is to get out of our own heads and attend to our bodies. Are you exercising at all? Getting any sun or fresh air? How is your nutrition? Substance use? Sleep schedule? Hygiene?

One of the first things I assess as a clinician when meeting a client is how that client treats their body. If someone is active, eats for joy and nutrition, schedules time for rest, uses substances responsibly, and is clean and well kempt, these are all signs of wellness! If a client is neglecting their body in some way, that is a sign that we need to direct our work towards physical self care as well as mental and emotional self care. Our mind and body are inextricably connected!

You don’t have to wait till you “feel like” taking care of your body. Start with small steps. Just:

o   Jump in the shower, and focus on the way the warm water gently cleanses your body. Use products that smell good and make your body feel cared for and attractive!

o   Identify and buy foods that you enjoy and that are healthy for you. Turn off the tv, turn on some positive music, and create a new recipe that you might enjoy. (Bonus points for inviting someone over to share your creation!)

o   Open the window, even if the temperature isn’t perfect. Breathe in the fresh air deeply and look for something beautiful outside your window.

o   Go for a walk/run/bike around the block. If you can, keep adding distance, speed, or vary your routine.

Again, it is not enough to know what your body needs, you must attend to those needs. I often advise my clients to treat themselves as they would treat a small child in their care. Would you allow that child to stay up all night and all day? Would you deprive that child of healthy foods? Would you numb that child’s emotions out with junk food, excessive screen time, or drugs? Would stop that child from exercising or breathing fresh air?

By caring for your body, you care for your inner child- and give him or her the strength to beat depression’s mind games.